Why You Don’t Do the Things You “Should”

Ask me what my least favorite word in the entire English language is…

…and I’ll probably tell you it’s “should.”

Lol, okay fine, there are obviously worse words, but check it out…

You know how it is.

You “should” go to the gym, you “should” eat healthily, you “should” read a book instead of going on your phone, etc. etc. etc….

It’s that little voice in the back of your head guilt-tripping you for every little thing that you’re doing “wrong.”

I’m not exactly sure why this little voice exists, tbh. Some theories of mine include the hustle culture of Western civilization and the constant dissatisfaction with one’s own circumstances that evolved from the primal need for survival back in the caveman days.

Doesn’t really matter to me though, what matters most is that exists.

And it plagues us all.

Shifting the Mental Framework

What has helped me with this is realizing that you don’t have to do anything.

Any sense of obligation or guilt doesn’t come from you. It’s meant to distract you and make you feel bad about yourself.

It’s a beautiful thing to realize you don’t need to identify with the bullshit propaganda of the mind.

I know what you might say.

“But Sol, what do you mean I don’t have to do anything? You’re saying I’m not obligated to be a good person? I can just do whatever I want and never feel guilty about anything?”

Here’s the thing. You don’t have to be a good person. Deep down, you realize you genuinely want to be a good person. This feeling alone motivates you to be helpful and kind. Guilt is unnecessary.

You don’t have to go to the gym. You do want to take care of yourself, so you go, even if you might not feel like it (I’m using the gym as an example. I know some people don’t like the gym; it can be whatever physical activity you enjoy).

You don’t have to be a good friend. You want to, because you love your friends and want to support others.

Guilt is destructive. Try connecting with the deeper desire instead, and let that motivate you.

Weekly Music Recommendation:

“Into the Woods” by Tycho

Tycho is the man. I love listening to this song during multiple different activities, whether it be working, studying, or working out. This is why I love his music so much, a lot of it is both upbeat but chill at the same time. It’s also usually instrumental, so it is easy to focus to. His production can be simple, but it’s effective, often utilizing minimal instrumentation focusing on arrangement and subtlety. Check it out on Spotify: 

Listen to all of the music I have recommended in this Spotify playlist.

From my weekly newsletter – 11/18/2024

If you’re like me and have multiple interests, sometimes it can feel overwhelming trying to manage your time. You want to reach your goals but don’t feel like you have enough time to pursue everything optimally. This makes you feel overwhelmed with choices and maybe even burnt out that you don’t have the energy for everything all at once. Thankfully, this idea of the mind is usually a myth, designed to keep us from actually taking action, which is what’s most important.